What so many foster children long for has happened the baby we have loved for the last 8 months. He has found a forever home.
Even as we grieve, our family has so much to be thankful for. The sweet little baby who has been entrusted to us for the last 8 months of his life (from 5 weeks to 9 months old!) had a place prepared for him by his auntie. She saved money, moved, bought a bed, stroller, car seat and many, many diapers. And, of course formula! She visited him almost EVERY Saturday for the last 5 months. She was live scanned and her new home was inspected. Auntie not only prepared a place for our sweet foster baby, but also his two sisters who have been in foster care for almost 2 years. They are 9 and 10. A family reunited.
Many times I told her that she was doing the right thing by bringing these sweet children into her home and if I was in her shoes, I would be doing it too. Through tears I told her this. So, on Thanksgiving day, at 7:30 in the morning, he moved from our home and into his new home.
Even today, almost a week later, my heart aches. Oh how I miss his little smiling face and sweet baby sounds and the sound of our little Joseph saying “baby” when he was getting his attention or talking about him. I miss little Joseph crawling into his crib just to be with him when they were supposed to be falling asleep. I miss watching “our” boys playing together on the floor and taking them shopping so they could smile at the people all around. I even miss the 2 am wake up calls. We love him SO much. We loved him as our own…and still do. This time we are on the “loss” side, the side of sorrow. We are experiencing the empty arms and the feeling of having no control. This time we grieve. And yet, while many tears have been shed, we do not grieve without hope. God loves this child.
There is so much JOY in his new home. God has given him a home with his biological family…with his Auntie who has sacrificially loves him and his two sisters. He brings such a lightheartedness to their home, a home that has had so much sorrow through the last two years. He makes them all smile and remember their blessings. I have so much respect for the way his auntie has turned her whole life around so she could be mom to these sweet children. I pray for her strength as she has a full-time job outside of her home so she can support her even fuller family. Another blessing here…as his aunt has opened her heart and her home to these sweet children, she also is joyful. She is a great example here. I haven’t heard her complain. She has been SO respectful of our family. She has been a joy to know. We hope to keep in touch with them.
I write today for several reasons…
1. to Honor the Lord for His kindness to our sweet boy. He kindly gave him a home where he would be tied to family. He kindly gave him an aunt and sisters who love him. He also kindly gave him to us for 8 months. We are SO grateful, even in our grief.
2. I write to honor this sweet boy’s aunt. She is such a blessing and a great example of how to love a family member and how to put others before yourself.
3. I also write to share the reality of foster care and foster adoption. There are joys and sorrows at every turn. Smiles and tears. But, know, that even in our deep grief, we have turned in our paperwork to do it again! There are so many children who need homes. And, truthfully, we need them too! Children are indeed a gift from the Lord…all children.
Please pray for us as we await our next sweet child. We hope to adopt this time as we were able to do the first and provide a forever home.
And, remember, if you are interested in learning more about Foster/Adoption, please call Maria Otero at (800) 730-3933 at Children’s Bureau. They are a wonderful resource and can answer your questions and get you going in the process if you are interested. Please tell them Robin and Diane sent you!
Oh gosh Diane… I am both happy AND sad while reading this. I know it’s for the best and that is the end goal and such an awesome thing he is with his family but I can also only imagine how hard that must be to bond and then have to let go. You {and your family} are amazing to do this. What an awesome ministry. Big hugs and I am sure the next child that needs care will ultimately be so blessed by being a part of your family for a time. xoxo
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Thank you Claire. It is so difficult and the loss is so real, yet, we are SO happy for him. We are so thankful to God.
So thankful for you, Robin, and the kids. You are an amazing example of God’s love. Blessings and comfort for you and the family. xo-Cynde
Thank you Cynde. We are so grateful to God for His great love toward us and so thankful.
Oh the memories you bring back to me. My parents were foster parents while I grew up and I sure can relate to the loss feeling. It is both sad and joyful. You are a blessing to all the children’s lives you have touched! Maybe God has a plan and you needed to be freed up to help that next little child that will come into your life…hugs xoxo Nina
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Thank you Nina. You are so right…both sad and joyful. We are certainly trusting God in this time that He knows the end from the beginning and is lovingly sovereign in our lives. Thank you for your support. 🙂
Praying you’ll continue to be comforted by the Lord and that a new little one will move in soon!
Thank you Glenna! So good to hear from you!!! We are grateful for your prayers!
That is so bittersweet. Once again your blog has brought me to tears! I’m not sure that I could handle the whole fostering process–having a child “taken away” would be so hard! I’m so glad the situation is going to be good, though. That’s a big blessing and a relief to you, I’m sure! What a neat day for the Aunt to bring him into her home-a little Thanksgiving blessing!
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Thank you for replying Brooke…so hard, but thankful that we have much to be thankful for. Still so many tears, but also many joys. Blessings to you!
My husband and I foster dogs and work with a local dog rescue. Not that I am comparing dogs to children, but it is REALLY hard when we send our foster dogs off to their new forever homes. I can’t even imagine how that would feel with a baby. Although, it really is bittersweet. So rewarding, but you can’t help but feel that sense of loss. I hope you guys get a new addition to your family soon! I’ll be keeping up with your blog from now on =] When my husband and I eventually do have children, we definitely want to foster some human children. Beautifully written, thank you for this post.
Thank you Christine! Thank you so much for your sweet comment! There is surely loss, but you are so right, there is great reward. I am so glad you also want to foster! There are so many needed to love on these sweet children who often have no one. Blessings to you!
Wow what an amazing story and you are such a wonderful person! This brought tears to my eyes as I read this! You are such a strong person to be able to go through having him taken away, I don’t think I could do it! God Bless you for doing such a wonderful thing!!
~Ciara @Teaspoon of Life
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This is so beautiful. My husband and I have talked about starting to foster children as we haven’t been able to have any of our own. My husband’s concern is when they leave and the love and hurt he will feel. I know that it would be hard on me too. I appreciate your story as it gives me more to think about whether we should do this or not. I am worried that I would want to adopt each of the foster children I was given. Precious that this infant and his siblings are reunited to a family member.
Thank you Marly. While you surely do put your hearts at risk to feel hurt, there is so much reward in being a part of a child’s life for even a little while. Our agency (Children’s Bureau) generally places children with you who will likely need to be adopted if that is your desire. It won’t always work out that way, but often it does, as in the case of our first whom we have had since he was 1 week old and is now 2 years old. Please let me know if there are any questions I can answer. I will pray for you and your husband while you make this decision. Blessings!
You are a hero. Not very many people could do what you are doing. It takes a very special person. Thank you for living these babies even when you might have to let them go.
Thank you Meagan. We are truly grateful to God for the strength he gives. Our hearts ache to be able to make a difference in the lives of these children who need so much love. Blessings to you!
Wow – what a story. This was both happy and sad. I am happy to hear that he is with his family and siblings. I hope you are able to keep in touch.
Hi Krystal, We are thankful that we will be able to keep in touch on some level. Time will tell how that will work out…but we are so grateful that there is a desire by his aunt to keep in touch with us.
What a special story you shared with the world. Loved it! Hugs! Linda
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Thank you Linda. We are thankful to have been privileged to live it.
What a beautiful thing, beautiful in it’s hope and in the way people come together in grief and love. Thank you for sharing this. Bless that boy, his siblings and auntie, and your family for caring for him. I am not sure you’ll have a chance to remain in his life or memory but the care you provided will be remembered on some level and he will know that love forever! Foster and adoption while so tragic by nature, are so incredibly beautiful too when children and loving families come together. My husband and I are in the very early process of adoption and it is my hope to provide foster care once we return stateside and settle down. I’ve been called to it for years now, waiting for the right time to make it happen!
Ashley, how exciting that you are adopting. It is such a joy to hear and I know a blessing to be a part of. We are so grateful to have been able to be a part of his formative first months. Even with the heartache, we are signed up again…God is so good to us! Blessings!
Wow, that must be really hard to go through. However, I feel confident that God sends extra blessings to those who are doing His work here on earth, taking care of the widows and the orphans, and serving the least of these.
I’m praying that the right child for your family will be entrusted to you. God bless you.
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Thank you Jamie! We are so grateful for God’s Grace through the difficulty. We are so grateful to have had him for the time we did. Thank you so much for your prayers. We are SO grateful for that!! Trusting God for who he will send next. 🙂
Amazing story and what a big heart you have.
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